maybe not clarity per se, but i seem to always reach this state of paralyzation. i feel numb. i don't know what to think. i listen to any possible kind of music and feel absolutely nothing. i talk about my feelings to anyone who will listen. but after all of that, i don't feel anything.
"Why is it such a struggle to love when it's so easy to hate?"(a quote from a friend's twitter)
i give. i give. i give.
i love. i love. i love.
i get hurt. I get hurt. I get hurt.
three times it's been and yet, i seem to (a) never learn and (b) never hated.
should i hate you? or do i really hate myself?
the thought is fleeting... it's passing... it's gone...
why do all the tough lessons have to hurt?
cue endless love. cue susie blue. cue clarity. i could cue every song in the book that makes sense with this post but none of them would matter.
because i don't feel anything.
i am numb.